Not everyone who starts out with us is capable of going where God wants to take us. Sometimes they don’t have the emotional capacity needed. Other times their vision is different from ours. So how can we know when it’s time to exit a friendship or another type of relationship? One way to check is whether it makes us feel drained. If it does, we may need to take a step back from it. This calls for setting clear boundaries. Draining ourselves emotionally and physically to make someone else feel needed might sound noble and self-sacrificing, but it’s not what God’s called us to do. He doesn’t want us to end up spent and burnt out, because when we get to that point, we don’t have enough energy left to reach our own God-given goal in life. If we feel a relationship isn’t going too well, we should pause, take a look, and also take it to God. Sometimes certain aspects of a relationship need to be ended, while other areas can be kept. We might have friendships that work in one area but not in another. Seeing a relationship in sections and closing the door on the sections that God says are not for us to deal with can help save an important relationship. We might have shared interests that need to be kept going, while other things need to be removed before we’re completely burnt out by them. For example, we might have a great relationship with someone in classes or at work, but things fall down when we’re involved in each other’s personal life. It’s possible to remove a section and still have a lot left to enjoy. It takes work, communication, and prayer, but it’s often worth it.

What Now?

Is there a relationship in your life that tend to leave you feeling drained? If the answer’s yes, spend some time telling God about it, and ask for His guidance on what boundaries you may need to set.