Yesterday we were talking about avoiding being critical. But there are times when we really do need to point out where someone's going wrong. So how can we avoid being harsh or judgemental? Here are a couple of things we can bear in mind: 1) A lot of the time, we want to help because we have more experience or know more about something. But even then, the person we’re trying to teach might not be in the right place to learn and listen to what we’ve got to say. God might still be bringing them to a position where they’re open and teachable, so we need to allow Him to guide us when we want to pass on our knowledge to others, and try to recognise when He’s telling us ‘not yet’. 2) Sometimes we can get so caught up in our own gifts that we forget God’s given us that unique set of skills (or even a set of experiences) for a reason, and that He gives everyone different skills. We somehow feel that everyone should be like us, and that prevents us making allowances for those who aren’t gifted in an area that we are. Think back to times when someone's given you feedback on something you’ve done. Chances are you’ll remember occasions that made you think ‘yes, I can do this better’, and other times when you felt like saying ‘I’m hopeless, I should just give up now’. Criticism given in the wrong way can make us feel anxious and in some cases, worthless. But when it’s given fairly and constructively, with real care and encouragement, not only does it show us where we’re going wrong, it fires us up to want to improve. So when we’re trying to help someone improve, let’s do it with kindness, understanding and empathy.

What now?
Who was the last person you criticised? Write down 10 skills they have that are different from yours. Ask if they would help you improve in a couple of those areas.