TODAY'S WORD FOR TODAY
Dictator, Doormat or Diplomat? (1)
‘…Don’t exasperate your children…’Ephesians 6:4 TM
Parenting children between puberty and young adulthood draws on every ounce of grace and wisdom you can muster. Your effort to train them - and their drive for independence - is a tug of war that frustrates you both. The outcome depends largely on which of three classic parenting styles you follow. Though parents with each style want the best for their kids, some styles work well and some don’t. Let’s examine each. The authoritarian style: some parents announce, ‘I make the rules and you follow them! Don’t question me, obey me’. Compliance at all times, respect for authority, traditional values and hard work are demanded. ‘There is only one opinion here: mine. All other opinions are considered mutiny!’. Authoritarians don’t tolerate losing face, don’t apologise or admit fault. They are blame-oriented, legalistic, judgmental, shaming, and belittling; expecting, yet exposing the worst in their kids. By coming down hard on them they provoke confrontations, then punish them harshly and unreasonably. Often they use Scripture to bolster their position. Let’s look at the pluses of this style: the rules are clear; it establishes chain of command; it speeds up the child’s response; it’s effective with very young and insecure kids, and can be useful in crisis times. Now let’s look at the minuses: it inhibits a child’s healthy individuation process; it retards mature communication; it promotes social dependence and incompetence; it discourages decision-making and initiative-taking skills; it elevates social anxiety and depression; it increases the likelihood of your child being intimidated and bullied, etc. Authoritarians may maintain military-style discipline, but they seldom rear happy, healthy, creative kids!
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The Word For Today is written by Bob and Debby Gass
PREVIOUS WORD FOR TODAY
19TH OCT 2017HAS YOUR LOVE GROWN COLD?
18TH OCT 2017IF IT’S GOD’S WILL - YOU CAN HAVE IT
17TH OCT 2017PASSING THE FEAR TEST
16TH OCT 2017KEEP GROWING
15TH OCT 2017PUT ON YOUR NEW CLOTHES
14TH OCT 2017DON’T BE SO EASILY UPSET
13TH OCT 2017AN APPETITE FOR GOD’S WORD
12TH OCT 2017CHANGE YOUR THINKING
11TH OCT 2017STOP BEING INTIMIDATED
10TH OCT 2017FRIENDSHIP (4)
9TH OCT 2017FRIENDSHIP (3)
8TH OCT 2017FRIENDSHIP (2)
7TH OCT 2017FRIENDSHIP (1)
6TH OCT 2017WHAT TO DO WHILE YOU’RE WAITING
5TH OCT 2017CELEBRATE YOURSELF - GOD DOES!
4TH OCT 2017STOP WORRYING ABOUT IT
3RD OCT 2017TREAT YOUR ENEMY WITH KINDNESS
2ND OCT 2017LISTEN CAREFULLY WITHOUT INTERRUPTING!
1ST OCT 2017THINGS CUT OFF, THINGS CUT BACK
30TH SEP 2017GOD IS REAL!
29TH SEP 2017YOU CAN CHANGE
28TH SEP 2017BE PASSIONATE, PROACTIVE, AND PERSISTENT
27TH SEP 2017A PRAYER FOR PEACE
26TH SEP 2017LEARN TO BE CONTENT