If you’re the kind of person who harbours grudges and holds on to past mistakes, even your own, you know what it feels like to be weighed down by mental baggage. It’s hard for a relationship to survive when neither party has processed what happened in the past. Like blame, mental baggage keeps you stuck. For example, if someone in a past relationship has hurt you and you’ve never let go of it, every time your mate does something similar it’s likely you’ll react with unwarranted fervour, as if he or she was the original person who hurt you. When this happens, your mate is left feeling upset and confused by your over-the-top reaction to a minor infraction that on the surface appears insignificant. Just as you clean house to get rid of physical rubbish, you need to keep your mental, emotional, and spiritual house clean and in order. Praying, reading, counselling, journalling, meditation, and exercise are all good ways to help ensure that past issues don’t seep into your current relationships. And when they do come up from time to time, it’s best to talk to the people you’re in relationship with. Just be sure to do it in kindness, truth, and honesty. The old adage – ‘Love means never having to say “I’m sorry”’ – is wrong! A more scriptural motto for keeping mental and emotional baggage in the bin where it belongs, is: ‘Don’t go to bed angry’ (Ephesians 4:26 GWT). The Bible says, ‘Be gentle, kind…meek, and patient. Put up with each other, and forgive anyone who does you wrong, just as Christ has forgiven you. Love… ties everything completely together’ (Colossians 3:12-14 CEV).