Your pattern sins (3)

Your pattern sins (3)

23 October 2018
‘Serve wholeheartedly, as if you were serving the Lord.’

Servers: Servers love to be needed. They’re natural caregivers who’ll fluff up your pillow even when it doesn’t need fluffing! They remember birthdays and anniversaries, and they’re often first to get up from the table and wash the dishes. Servers often work in social settings where they support other people. They’re most comfortable when they have something to do. But while they’re drawn to help people, that helping often comes from their own neediness. Lurking under their servant-hood is sometimes low self-esteem that demands to be fed. And because it can never be fully satisfied, they end up draining others. Martha is a great illustration. While she was busy serving, her sister Mary sat at Jesus’ feet (see Luke 10:39-42.) On the plus side, servers demonstrate love in action and have a natural other-centeredness that makes people feel cared for. On the minus side, they sometimes use their ‘giving’ to manipulate others. And the problem is that when you try to lighten their burden and lift their load, they won’t let you. Their innate fear of not being needed makes it impossible for them to set healthy boundaries. So what’s the answer? a) Make sure your first priority is serving God, not people. ‘Serve wholeheartedly, as if you were serving the Lord, not men.’ b) Understand that your reward comes from God, not other people. ‘The Lord will reward everyone for whatever good he does’ (Ephesians 6:8 NIV 1984 Edition). c) Don’t complain. ‘Do everything without complaining or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault’ (Philippians 2:14-15 NIV 1984 Edition).

Copyright © Bob and Debby Gass. Used by permission.